Midsummer Night's Post

Ok, so it's not really a midsummer NIGHT so much as a midsummer I-should've-gone-to-bed-hours-ago-but-it's-6am-now-so-I'm-bored-and-going-to-post-something post. I was just sitting here, checking Blogger and Facebook and thinking about how I should be doing something worthwhile with my time. I mean, this is my last summer of complete freedom, really.

I just think that I could be spending my time doing more meaningful things than posting on a role playing website (not that it's not fun and totally relaxing, but what'll it get me later on in life?). I'm waiting for some books to arrive from Amazon for my graduation project. I'm kind of excited and kind of scared about it. I have to write 20-30 pages on urban legends and I have to read 5-8 books about the subject and I have to hand a chapter outline in to the board of education for the seal of approval and then I have to present it to a panel of teachers and I'm really scared.

I'm scared of the whole final exam thing, really. Not only do I have to write this thesis about urban legends, but I have to pick two other subjects to present in orally, both of which require 15-20 on a specific topic and I have no earthly idea which subjects to take and what topics to pick. I need to know by September because I need to notify the teachers and get to work because it has to be done by December.

I'm still just wishing that I could either die or move out of Austria because I honestly don't think I can take the pressure. I mean, I've only been here for, what, 7 years? That is not enough time to prepare for these exams! Everyone else has had 12 years. Plus they've all been speaking German their entire lives! I have nowhere near the amount of perfection they have at this language. And I have to write an entire 15-20 pages EACH on a topic of my choice? And I have to be able to talk about it for 15 minutes?

I can barely talk in front of people for five minutes, let alone 15. I stutter and stammer and have to think of things to say for a really long time...I'm not good at it at all! I don't have the right phrases or special words, so I have to make due with what I can and that's not all that much when you put it all together.

I really, truly wish that I could just get in a life-threatening accident and not have to do this. Or maybe I could just skip this year and go straight to trade school. What do I need to take a test for, anyway? Proving that I can do the math and speak English and French and work on computers? Why can't they just look at the final report card of the 12th grade and be done with it? We have to take tests too! So maybe they aren't oral tests, but what does that matter? No one cares about verbal agreements. It's all about the documents nowadays.

--Cassy

Comments

KayteeKhaos said…
No accidents. T.T
No dying. T.T
I'll just kidnap you. ♥
Chloe said…
Much appreciated. x)

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