Cassy In Her Own World

So, for the past two years I have been waiting for a time where a tattoo would not cost over 100 Euros, where my family or I had the money to spend on said tattoo and for myself to get the balls to do it. That time came yesterday. On Friday, May 20th, 2011 at 3:10 pm in Vienna, Austria at the Spirit Tattoo Studio, I got a tattoo. And it's permanent. And awesome. I debated long and hard what I would get. Chinese symbol that means something to me? A star cause I think it looks cool? Or something else? I finally found the answer when I was looking through old photo albums. I found a bunch of pictures of my father and I just remembered how he used to have a pin in the shape of the ace of spades. I don't know where the pin went -- after he died we got some of his things and I think it was in them, but we must have lost it at some point or my sister has it -- but I realized that my most prominent memory of him is in that pin. After having a rough time dealing with the fact th...

Write a letter to yourself. So, I kind of forgot about this one, so it's a little late...But to be fair, it's called the 30 Day Writing Challenge, not the 31 Day Writing Challenge. Dear Chloe,   I'm not really sure what they want me to write about in this one. But I've had that feeling before, remember? Your last few entries have been short ones, but there really wasn't much more to say, I guess, because what you wrote really did say it all. And hey, sometimes less really is more. I forgive you, I suppose. But if you do do this again in the future, try and elaborate a bit more. You know probably only 1 or 2 people are ever going to read it, but don't skimp! Maybe they want a little more than 2 sentences and a smiley.   Today is your four month anniversary with Eric. <3 It's good to know your heart still jumps when he says he loves you with no hinting (although yesterday you DID e-hug him into saying it, I suppose. But he could've just hugged b...

Someone in your family that means so much to you. Poppy Grandma Mom Dad Phoebe Andrew Nathan Aunt Susan Uncle Sean Meghan Brianna Tommy Carl Aunt Jen Uncle Matt Rachel Julia Ben Emma Uncle David Aunt Donna Emily John Elizabeth Alexander Nikolai Anna Katie Peter Juliana Nicolas and of course, the honorary family members: Kaytee Hannah Crystal Eric Cory Anja Alina Melisa Chrisi Sandra You've made my life worthwhile. <3 --Cassy

What WAS your biggest dream in life (you wanted to do as a kid but no longer can)? I wanted to be a veterinarian for the looooooongest time. But then I realized sometimes you had to hurt or kill animals and I couldn't bear doing that, so I gave the dream up. --Cassy

What is your biggest dream in life (what one thing do you want to accomplish)? My biggest dream that is in the realm of possibility would be to open my own hotel (however unlikely that is starting to look). My biggest pipe dream, that I really really really want but will most likely never ever ever get is to work behind the scenes on a movie or TV show set. Working with actors and directors, producers and technicians is my dream. Hard work that is fun at the same time, and even if it's just fetching coffee and water or something, it'd be worth it. Being a part of making movie magic, something I have been in love with since I can remember, meeting various actors that I've idolized in my mind to the point of no return, working with brilliant people with intriguing ideas I'd never be able to come up with...I want it really bad, but I just can't seem to make myself do something about it. I'm too scared of the possibility (the very likely possibility) of failure,...

What is your vocation? (Why are you here on Earth?) If I knew that, I'd get right to it. As it were, I do not know, therefore I cannot start. I could make guesses, I suppose, but what would that do? Ruin the magic, that's what. --Cassy

How do you handle/deal with both success and failure? I handle success with a smile on my face and failure with an even bigger one to hide my tears.

Discuss something you planned that ended up not being what you expected. Life. --Cassy

Discuss a spontaneous moment in your life that that turned out to be fantastic. Trying out these 30 Day Challenges worked out pretty well. x) --Cassy

Describe a truly spiritual moment in your life. I suppose any time I go for a walk late at night and there's no one on the street with me. I can look up and see the stars clearly and just talk. About anything. Life, death, friends, family, troubles, problems, happy things. I can ask questions, tell stories, jokes, random words. And when I'm done, usually a wind breezes past me, letting me know someone was listening. --Cassy

Describe a dark/turbulent moment in your life. I had one recently. I was out for a walk, listening to music, as usual, you know. Suddenly, I picture myself standing at the cliff where my aunt threw my father's ashes into the sea. I was standing there, just talking to him. Saying things that I've always wanted to say but never could. I started to cry -- in real life as well -- as I stood there (in reality I was still walking. How weird would it be to see a girl standing on the sidewalk crying? Probably not as weird as a girl walking the same stretch of sidewalk back and forth crying, but still...) I only wish it'd been raining. That would've made that walk perfect. --Cassy

Write about your best friend (not significant other) and what makes them special. Sidenote: I love that they assume one's significant other is automatically a best friend. It's not always the case. (But it is in mine. <3) Kaytee: She is just the right amount insane for me. She's outgoing and upbeat. She's beautiful and sees the good in everyone she meets. She's up for anything and has a wonderful soul. My life wouldn't be the same without her in it. Hannah: Probably the craziest of us all, but at the same time also the most down-to-Earth. And that's not just because she now has a little baby girl (<3 Lilyanna Park Knapper!). Hannah is proof that good things happen to good people. Casper: The toughest amigop of us all. The toughest and the one that gives me the most hope. She's so strong, has so much faith and is so positive that it's hard not to be around her. She has her dark moments, but she comes out of them stronger than ever...

Discuss your favorite movie and why it's so special to you. Oh, movies...How I love thee. I love them all! Ok, that's a lie. But the ones I watch are all beloved favorites, so it would be impossible to list every one and tell you why I like them. But I suppose my ABSOLUTE, ALL-TIME FAVORITE iiiiiiss..... Chocolat Ok, not really, but it's damn near the top, and since I can't think of just one specific movie, I'll just use this one. ^^ I like this movie not only because the awesome Johnny Depp and Judi Dench play in it, but because the story is interesting, it's told well, the acting is phenomenal and the music is incredible. --Cassy

Something that shook your belief system to its core (a big disappointment in your life) I'm not sure this has ever actually happened to me... Lucky, I know. But I suppose I can use this example: I'm used to getting what I want. At home, at school, with people. For some reason, through no personal (intentional) influence of my own, I generally get things on my first try. I applied for my Tourism Management training course in November 2010. I chose this course because it was the fastest way to get where I wanted to be career-wise and it also had the perk of being absolutely free save room and board charges at the school. Also, some of the hotels offered a place to stay at the hotel while I was working there, leaving me rent-free for almost two years (again, save 800 Euros for the entire two years at school --read: 200 Euros/Semester). I applied, was contacted, was told I was granted an interview. I went to the interview and nailed it. Not long after it I was told I was ac...

Someone you met randomly that's made an impact on your life. I don't think this counts as particularly random, but I met my Austrian best friend by pure chance in 9th grade. I was new to the class, had grabbed a seat in the front row (my row of choice, get all the snickering out right now before you keep reading, jerks), and was minding my own business reading when all of a sudden, someone taps my shoulder and asks me if she and her friend can switch seats with me so they can sit closer to their friends. Naturally, willing-to-please as I am, I agreed and moved one row back (now I was sitting second row out of three. Practically in the shadows!). Later that week, the girl's friend (the one who hadn't spoken with me, but had taken my seat), came to talk to me and told me she thought her friend had been rude and she really didn't want to sit up front and she was sorry. From then on, we were fast friends. We stayed close for a long time, had our ups and downs as ...

Someone with whom you shared a friendship/relationship that simply drifted out of your life. Pretty much everyone I ever met before I moved any time up until Pottstown, PA. --Cassy

day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year

LILYANNA PARK KNAPPER WELCOME TO THE WORLD!! I can't wait to meet you and spoil you rotten with love, little girl.  I love you!! -- Aunt Cassy

A book I've read that changed my views on something I have read a lot of books in my time (namely, 19 years). I don't know if I can say that any one book changed my views on anything, but a collection of them helped me realized that being creative is a gift -- one that you should never give up.  Ella Enchanted Harry Potter The Chronicles of Narnia The Princess Series by Gail Carson Levine Those are just a few of the books and series that I've read that had made a significant difference in my life. I learned that fantasy was just another way to express your feelings and that if you can do that on a regular basis, your life will seem much less of a challenge. Where people in books face dragons and emperors and witches and villains, in my life I've only ever really faced a few challenges.  I'm set in my beliefs, and books haven't really changed those. Then again, I don't really read any books that are all too life-changing. Although, the biography I did a b...

day 29 - a song from your childhood   day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year

A band/musical artist whose music has impacted my life I have to say that this would be Good Charlotte. It is my absolute favorite band. To understand why, I'd have to start with how I found them: I was home alone during the summer in Austria, watching MTV, because it was the only channel that had English programs that were worth seeing (I wasn't much of a fan of CNN back when I was 12). The shows were over for the moment, but I decided to just leave MTV on because I didn't feel like tackling Austrian shows just yet. I don't remember many of the songs that were playing, but I do know that when Good Charlotte's "Predictable" came on, I was glued to the TV. It wasn't just the music, it was the whacked video that did me in. It was rock, it was deep, it was awesome. Later, I went on the computer and tried to find the band that had mesmerized me. It didn't take long, and soon I was the proud owner of the Young & the Hopeless. I fell in love, p...

day 28 - a song that makes you feel guilty day 29 - a song from your childhood   day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year